One Year Ago

2 Corinthians 5:1
1Now we know that if the earthly tent we live in is destroyed, we have a building from God, an eternal house in heaven, not built by human hands.

It is coming up on one year since our house fire, May 30, 2009. I have been thinking a great deal about this in the last few weeks. Thankfully, it is not a bitter time, but more of thankfulness and deeper revelation. I am so grateful for God's amazing protection and how He has redeemed our circumstances.

Psalm 34:7 The angel of the LORD encamps around those who fear him, and he delivers them.

Everything We Need

Upon reflection over the events of that fateful morning, I have to marvel at how God provided for us. When exiting the house, I grabbed my purse, car keys, digital camera, and some jackets out of the coat closet. We didn’t waste any time. I headed out, with the kids emerging behind me. It was a blessing that I had parked in the driveway rather than my usual garage routine. This was because there was a table set up in the garage from a family gathering a few days earlier. We hadn’t gotten around to putting things away. John also backed out of the driveway shortly after me.

I had never been able to “train” my husband, when it came to putting things in their proper place. This was a source of frustration for the family. When entering my home, I would routinely place my purse, car keys, and cell phone on the desk in the kitchen. John on the other hand, would put his important items in the pocket of whatever he happened to be wearing. At some point he would remove the item of clothing and leave it on a kitchen chair, in the mudroom, or on the bedroom floor to be found the next time the items were needed. This frustrated everyone in the family, except of course John, who in turn felt frustrated in our lack of enthusiasm for help in finding the items.

But on this day, it was me who could not locate my cell phone. It wasn’t in my purse like normal. A while later I remembered the jackets I had grabbed from the house. I had worn my leather jacket to the baseball game the night before. It had been very cold and windy. Wouldn’t you know, my phone was in the pocket of that jacket . . . with me in the car. Thank you, God.

Meeting up with John, he told me that he could not locate his wallet. He had also grabbed his jacket and had dropped it in the front yard. I retrieved the jacket and wouldn’t you know, his wallet was in the pocket. Again, thank you God. I still think it was a miracle that John was able to locate his car keys in such a panicked situation. It was surely the hand of God taking care of us.

The Shoes

As we evacuated our burning house, our sons and pets ended up in the van with me. We moved away from our home and stopped a few houses up the street. At this time, safely out of the house, and a few minutes past the adrenaline rush, a wave of emotion swept over me. As I listened to the beautiful song speaking to me through my car speakers I was overwhelmed. “Jesus, you’re watching over me, as I trust and obey.”

A neighbor, whose house we were parked in front of, approached our vehicle and asked if everyone had shoes. Well, in assessing each of us, Alex did not have shoes on. “What size are you?” he asked. “I’ll be right back.” He proceeded to open the trunk of his car and came back with a nice looking pair of athletic shoes. “Congratulations!” he said. This seemed like a very strange thing to say to a neighbor whose house was in flames just down the street. He went on to tell us that he was one of the Green Bay Packer equipment managers. The pair of shoes he had given us were from the 2008 Pro Bowl in Hawaii. He had them in his car, because he was going to be donating them to one of the local schools.

Funny, the things you learn on days like this. I had no idea who this man was, even after seven years of living down the street. It was a refreshing act of kindness.

Nature Reminds Us

The morning of our house fire, we were awakened around 3:30 AM and evacuated the house. At one point I had to get back in my car to move further down the street, when the fire department arrived. I distinctly remember hearing the birds singing, as I walked back toward the house. Who knew that birds started singing well before 4 AM in the morning? I was never one to be outside that early. Something about hearing the birds comforted me. Remember . . . the world keeps spinning, the birds will sing. . . life will go on. . . .it will be alright.

Restoration Rescue

I don’t know about you, but I know that I am a procrastinator at heart. Especially regarding things that make me feel overwhelmed or not knowing where to begin. For several years now, we have faithfully filed an extension for our annual taxes. This provides me with several additional months with which to procrastinate in getting all my tax info together. It would be much healthier to just grab the bull by the horns and get the dreaded work done. Instead I experience the pangs of panic in the wee hours of the night, when everything seems so much more dramatic and dreadful.

Our house was becoming one of these dreaded projects. At 25+ years of age, our house needed some serious repair and would require substantial funds ($). Our cedar siding needed a good stain/paint job. Some boards needed to be replaced. The wood peckers had taken a liking to the neighboring homes. We had received a few quotes to have our roof replaced. A metal roofing company had given us a quote of $45,000 or some crazy amount. Many of our big beautiful windows had lost their seal. A fog developed between the panes of glass and mold around the window edges. Our big bay window could have cost well over $5000 in itself. Our furnace and air conditioner were original to the house. It was only a matter of time for those! The most obvious project was our wrap around deck. We had a large deck outside our kitchen and dining area. It also wrapped around the back side of the house and had stairways leading down into the wooded ravine. The wood had been in poor shape when we bought the house 7 years earlier, although not obvious at the time. After staining the wood and watching huge sections peel up, we realized it was not just a cosmetic problem. Then the hand rails started rotting and coming apart. Frequently we had to scold the kids and their friends for running full speed across a deck that probably was no longer safe. The summer before the fire, we began the process of pulling up the nails on the boards. We planned to use the existing boards as a template to cut the new lumber. Somehow we never fully took on the challenge of buying the lumber and recruiting the labor to get the deck rebuilt.

On Memorial Day weekend of 2009, we had a family gathering at our house and ended up moving the party to the garage and driveway, because of our dissected deck situation. Turns out, that was the last party we held at our house. The following Friday, the kids had a half day of school. I spent the afternoon with the boys working around the yard and doing some projects. Bennett and I replaced our mailbox feeling a sense of accomplishment. The mailbox had been missing the door for many months! The mail had been getting snowed on and rained on! We felt good about finally taking care of that project and we also beautified the flower bed in the front yard with a fancy new bird feeder and some hanging baskets. It looked really nice.

The next morning we had our world shaken. We stood as a family, watching our house go up in flames, from across the street. A mixture of horror, dread, disbelief, confusion . . . all these things and more running through our heads. “But we just replaced the mailbox!” “I guess it is good that we didn’t put all that time and money in all the repairs.” “I bet the firemen almost killed themselves when they stepped up on the deck. I hope nobody got hurt on our crazy deck.”

In the days following the fire we talked about a feeling of relief of not having all the repair projects hanging over our heads. It was a burden lifted. A small silver lining.

Oh No!

Ok, this story is a bit embarrassing. One evening this past summer, when we were living with our friends, we had the house to ourselves, while our friends attended an evening baseball game.

We decided to do something simple for supper. We cooked up some frozen pizzas using this countertop pizza maker they had. We also were mesmerized by this NAT Geo show featuring a very rare and bizarre disease that caused growths all over this guys face. It was disturbing and fascinating at the same time. Suddenly, smoke alarms went off in the house. The pizza was flaming and the kitchen was filled with smoke. We grabbed the pizza maker and headed out the patio door with it. Apparently I hadn’t set it up correctly and the pizza was not able to turn under the heating element. Therefore a triangular section of pizza was flaming, while the remainder was still frozen. We opened every conceivable door and window that we could. We searched the house for fans and set them up in front of open doorways. After about an hour the smoke was no longer visible . . .but you know the smell was still there. And luckily the bugs and mosquitoes didn’t seem to invade the house.

Man did we feel like idiots when our friends arrived home! It’s bad enough that we lost our house to a fire, but we certainly didn’t want to endanger them by living there. Thankfully they took it in stride and with humor. Talk about adrenaline rush/panic attack hearing smoke alarms and seeing flames and smoke.

Reflections

I was asked to write about our house fire experience in the women’s newsletter publication of my church. I found it challenging to tell my story in concise form, trying to blend so many strong feelings and realizations into one writing. So instead, I shared how I was impacted by the experience. Following is the writing I submitted.

I have experienced God’s hand of protection. It was obvious to all of us as a family. We all experienced God’s protection in our lives whether aware of it or not, but this was on such a big scale. This was in the midst of the very dangerous and powerful force of fire. This was realizing that without Gods protection and timing, we all could easily have been killed. It was God that woke us up in the middle of the night, not smoke detectors, not loud noises. It was God’s timing that saved us from being engulfed in smoke and flames just minutes after our exit. We didn’t lose a family member or even a pet. We didn’t lose our photos. All of the most precious and important things we hold dear were saved. I call them my 3 P’s . . .my people, my pets & my pictures. This may sound strange, but there is a certain exhilaration of experiencing God’s protection in an event like this, as awful as it was.

Isaiah 43:2-3
2 When you pass through the waters,
I will be with you;
and when you pass through the rivers,
they will not sweep over you.
When you walk through the fire,
you will not be burned;
the flames will not set you ablaze.
3 For I am the LORD, your God,
the Holy One of Israel, your Savior;

Possessions are a burden. We experienced a type of freedom, through this fire. I don’t’ know if I can adequately explain this. Maybe you need to live and experience this to understand. Have you ever watched an episode of “Hoarders”? They try to help people who have come under the sickness of hoarding possessions. These people live in filth and squalor because they cling to things and possessions. Or think of someone who lives a life dedicated to missions. Possessions and stuff are of little value to them. There was a certain freeing that took place for us. So when we found our new house and started the process of acquiring possessions, it was especially conflicting for my husband. We sort of questioned whether we were supposed to return to the normal life style. We have learned that things are just things. They are not “who” we are. They don’t define us or control us.

Matthew 6:19-21 19"Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. 20But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. 21For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.

I have learned to trust God. This is also a faith thing. I never thought of myself as having a large portion of faith. I could relate to Thomas wanting to touch the scars and see for himself before allowing himself to fully believe that Jesus was alive again. But when you experience something on this scale first hand, how can you not gain faith and trust? This is something that will stay with me forever . . . . at least that is my prayer.

Psalm 9:9-10 9 The LORD is a refuge for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble. 10 Those who know your name will trust in you, for you, LORD, have never forsaken those who seek you.
"Greater is He that is in me, than he that is in the world" 1 John 4:4

I can let go of trying to control my life. God’s ways are best for me. I can trust Him and what He has set before me for my life. Worrying and trying to predict my life is not really honoring to God. It is not always to my benefit to know what my future holds! A house fire for instance. What is important is that I trust Him and depend on Him as I go through life in all circumstances.

Matthew 6:25-27 25"Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? 26Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? 27Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life[b]?

I need to always be thankful and aware of His love and blessings. Everyday God touches our lives in special ways. Are we paying attention? Do we go back to thank Him or are we more like the nine lepers that didn’t return after they were healed?

Psalm 9:1-21 I will praise you, O LORD, with all my heart; I will tell of all your wonders. 2 I will be glad and rejoice in you; I will sing praise to your name, O Most High.

I need to be ready to obey. Why should I fight His will in my life? Hasn’t He proved Himself trustworthy? Have I forgotten so quickly the miracles and the blessings? What does He have planned for me? I pray that my answer will be, “Yes, Lord.”

God has the power to redeem our circumstances and turn tragedy into blessing in ways we could never imagine. A friend of mine asked, “How can you talk about the fire as a blessing?” Well that is a story I am excited to tell, but not a short story with a quick answer. God was preparing us in the months leading up to the fire. My husband and I were experiencing a renewal and hunger for scripture and learning. We may have responded differently had we not been prepared. He spared all of us from traumatic effects. He moved us into a wonderful and comforting experience living with friends over the summer. (The healing of that important friendship is another separate story in itself.) He provided us with a beautiful new home beyond my expectations. It is a wonderful blessing. He changed our hearts and made us stronger in our faith and trust in Him. He blessed us financially, because of this fire.

Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God. For just as the sufferings of Christ flow over into our lives, so also through Christ our comfort overflows. 2 Corinthians 1:3-5 NIV